


Right Now

by WildwingSuz



Category: The X-Files
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-07
Updated: 2015-05-07
Packaged: 2018-03-29 12:41:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3896692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WildwingSuz/pseuds/WildwingSuz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Smut and angst from Mulder’s POV.  That’s it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Right Now

**Author's Note:**

> Another smut biscuit; after doing the previous one from Scully’s POV I wanted this one to be from Mulder’s. Plus a little angst always makes things more interesting! 
> 
> Spoilers: all things (of course!), though this takes place several months later.

Right Now  
By Suzanne Feld  
Rated NC-17

I couldn’t quite believe I was here, thrusting deeply into Scully’s tight, wet canal as her inner walls contracted around me, my hands still unsteady and almost shaking as I held her strong, silken body close against me. Her breasts rubbed against my chest, taut nipples scraping through the light hair and sending tiny lightning bolts through me. It had all happened so fast that it still didn’t feel real even as I heard her gasp and murmur, “Oh, Mulder,” in my ear as her orgasm peaked and ebbed. She relaxed against me, laying her head on my shoulder and puffing a breath on my sweaty neck that felt wonderful. I felt a surge of arousal peaking in my lower belly but battled it back, slowing my thrusts until I came to a stop and loosening my arms enough that I could cup her head in my hands and kiss her soft, full mouth again. And again.

“I love you, Scully,” I whispered as she nestled even tighter against me, arms around my shoulders and cheek resting against mine. I reached down, sliding my hands under her soft ass and lifted her hips so that I could drive up into her again, pulling her back against me even as I thrust up into her. Her bed wasn’t quite bouncing but it was close, and it was a good thing we’d started near the middle because we were close to the edge now. “You are incredible.”

“So are you,” she breathed, leaning back so that we could see each other and where our bodies joined; I couldn’t help my eyes dropping there and when I looked back up at her, saw that she was doing the same. That did it for me; I felt my balls drawing up and tingling and with a cry of her name that they probably heard in the Hoover Building miles away I let go, slamming and holding her down on me as I let go everything I had into her, hips jerking helplessly, the force and depth of the orgasm making my head spin.

Afterward we rested against each other, her soft warm bottom snuggled in between my thighs, legs curled around my hips, my arms loosely around her waist while hers rested over my shoulders with our foreheads leaning against each other. When I finally softened enough to slip out of her I let her go with a soft regretful groan and we both toppled over onto our sides facing each other.

“I probably shouldn’t open my big mouth, but I have got to ask what brought this on,” I said, running one hand along her side from just below her ribs, following the line of her narrow waist and resting it on her bare, lightly sweated hip. “Normally when I come over we don’t end up in your bedroom damn near first thing.” I had come over for a Sunday evening pizza and movie night and we’d been in the kitchen cleaning up after eating when she’d stumbled and fallen against me. I’d caught her by the shoulders and after a moment of gazing at each other I’d found her in my arms and us kissing madly. Twenty minutes later, here we were.

She shrugged. She was laying on her side with one arm bent under her head, the other hand laying flat on the bed between us. “I guess… I just needed this. I mean, we never talked about our first time…”

“No, we didn’t,” I agreed softly, moving my arm to rest my head on like she was and smiling at her. “But not matter what brought it on, I’m glad we’re finally together.”

One slender, arched auburn eyebrow raised. “Together? What do you mean, Mulder?”

I gazed back at her, confused. “Together. You know, as in… together. A couple. Two people who find each other sexually attractive and can do this more often than once every three months or so.”

She rolled away and sat up on the edge of the bed, frowning back over her shoulder at me. Uh-oh. “What makes you think that? Just because we have sex occasionally doesn’t mean—“

I sat up, frowning back. “Occasionally? Twice in seven-some-odd years? That’s less than occasional, Scully,” I said, getting annoyed with her sudden coolness. “That’s more like rarely if ever. And it’s nowhere damn near enough for me.”

“It works for me,” she said, reaching down and picking up my grey t-shirt, pulling it on over her nude body before disappearing into the bathroom. She’d done the same thing the last time, walking around my apartment in the black tee I’d been wearing underneath my sweater before I’d dragged her back to bed for a second bout and passed out afterwards to wake alone. Somehow, though, I didn’t think that that was going to happen this time.

Sure enough when she came out of the bathroom she had her old white bathrobe on over my t-shirt, belted tightly at the waist with nothing more than her head, hands, and feet showing. “You should probably get going, Mulder, we’ve got work in the morning,” she said, reaching down to scoop up my jeans and toss them on the foot of the bed.

“It’s only seven o’clock, Scully,” I said with a glance at her alarm clock, moving to lounge up against the headboard, still stark naked and sprawled uncovered across her bed. Deliberately. “What’s your hurry? Trying to get rid of me?”

“Not exactly, but I do have a few things to take care of tonight,” she said edgily, putting my socks into my shoes and nudging them towards the bed with her foot. “You know, laundry, get my clothes ready for tomorrow, that sort of thing.”

“So much for our movie night, eh?” I said offhandedly, but I was watching her like a hawk. I was beginning to catch on to her love-‘em-and-leave-‘em attitude and wasn’t going to leave without a fight—or talking about it, whichever occurred. Regardless, I wasn’t going to make it as easy for her as I had last time. Look where that had gotten me—months had gone by before we’d made love again. I’d had enough of that.

“Mulder…” she sighed, hands on hips. “Can’t you take a hint?”

“No, I can’t,” I said bluntly. “Why do you want to get rid of me right afterward, Scully? No cuddling, no affection, just fuck and leave? Ever consider that doesn’t make me feel very good?”

“You’re a man,” she said dismissively, to my surprise. “I thought that didn’t bother you.”

I was aghast and didn’t hide it, sitting up on the edge of the bed but not reaching for any of my clothes. “Just because I happened to be born with testicles does not mean I don’t like to hold you afterward and have some damn affection shown towards me, or show it towards my partner,” I said, stressing the last word. “Whomever she may be, not that there’s been more than one in, oh, the last seven years or so.” I was omitting an incident that had occurred when she’d been missing; it didn’t really count to my way of thinking. “And I especially like to spend time with the woman I’m in love with.”

She flinched, actually flinched, when I said that, crossing her arms and hunching her shoulders. “You don’t have to say that, Mulder, when we’re not in bed.”

I saw red; literally saw red. Taking a couple of deep breaths I steadied and calmed myself as much as I could. “Scully…” I said, glaring up at her, “I don’t know what in the hell is going on with you, but that is possibly the meanest thing a woman has ever said to me without exception. And I’ve been with some real bitches before you as you well know. Why would you say that?”

She heaved a sigh, leaning one shoulder against the wall next to her dresser and staring down at the floor. “I don’t mean to hurt you, Mulder, but let’s face facts. You can be emotional at times. I know you think you love me when we’re in bed, but you don’t. Not that way, not really, when we’re not having sex.”

Now I did get to my feet, feeling my entire body thrumming with anger, and stalked over to her, bracing my arms on either side of her head and deliberately looming over her. She continued to look away from me. “Since when did you become psychic?” I demanded furiously. “How in the hell do you know what I’m thinking, feeling? You’re assuming and assigning feelings and thoughts to me that I’m not having. Is it because that’s how you feel about me, you assume I feel the same damn way? Well, I’m not a fucking gigolo, Scully. If you just need your itch scratched and want a guy who’ll leave afterward then go out and buy one; I’m not for sale. I really thought we had something special together but obviously I was mistaken.”

Now I did turn away and grab my jeans, digging my underwear out of the mass of denim and yanking both on without looking at her. I had never been this angry with her in all the years we’d known each other. When I turned back, reaching for my shoes, I glanced at her and saw her staring at me with a look of shock on her face. “What?” I snapped. “Are you really that damn surprised that I won’t play your goddamn game?”

“I’m not quite sure what to say now,” she said, looking at me with an odd expression. “I was only trying to do what I thought you wanted, what I thought you assumed best for our partnership and friendship. Make it easy for you to leave.”

I frowned at her as I sat on the edge of the bed to pull on my white sweatsocks. “Why in the hell would you think that either of us treating the other like shit would be what I wanted?”

“I didn’t… because… because you never said a word after the first time,” she said almost defensively, crossing her arms beneath her breasts. “I thought maybe you wanted to forget it, go back to the way things were. I couldn’t help what started tonight, I wanted you so bad that I just didn’t have the strength to stop even though I knew I should.”

“There’s more to it than that,” I said, voicing my suspicion. Now that I was calming down a little I was able to think a bit more clearly and my psychology training was coming into play.

She nodded, still not looking at me. “I asked you to leave just now because I… I don’t want to go and fall even deeper in love with you. I couldn’t take it if you acted like it didn’t happen again.”

The proverbial light bulb went on over my head as my anger drained away. Dear God, I’d tried to do what I thought she wanted when she didn’t say anything the day after when we saw each other at the office again. “Oh, Christ, Scully, I didn’t bring it up because you didn’t,” I said, feeling my anger drain away. I had one shoe on and dropped the other to the floor untied. “I tried to be professional at the office, not show how I felt about you, and when you didn’t say anything I thought that was how you wanted it. I wasn’t sure you felt the same way about it that I did. Maybe we ought to try telling each other how we feel instead of assuming how and what the other’s feeling.”

She lifted her head and looked at me nakedly. A mixture of fear, anger, and worry was on her expressive face. “I’m afraid to,” she said simply.

“I’m not,” I said, toeing off the one shoe I’d put on and going to her. What the hell, I had nothing to lose at this point—and everything to win. I took her by the shoulders and looked down at her, hoping that my face showed what I was feeling. She looked back at me almost fearfully; not as if in danger for her life but as if afraid to hear what I’d say. “I did go and fall madly in love with you—a long time ago, as a matter of fact. I meant and still mean everything I said when we were in bed,” I told her, gazing into her wide clear blue eyes. “Now that you know, won’t you tell me and put me out of my misery?”

She smiled tremulously up at me but her eyes were wary. “I’m afraid that this is too good to be true,” she said. “I’ve… thought about how it might be if you did have… romantic… feelings for me and this certainly wasn’t the way it played out.”

I felt I was on the right track and went with my feelings. Instead of pushing—I know how she is with force, be it physical or mental—I gently enfolded her in my arms, wrapping them around her shoulders to hold her close to me. Her arms went around my chest, her head resting against my shoulder as I buried my face in her thick soft hair. She smelled like the sex we’d just had and I felt my body reacting predictably but ignored it for the moment. “Then tell me whenever you’re ready,” I said low into the soft hair over her ear. “I’ll never force you to anything but you need to know, Scully, that I love you as more than just a friend and partner, I love you for the woman, for the person you are. And no matter what happens from here on out you’ll always be the one true love of my life.”

“God, Mulder,” she choked out. “It’s like the more I try not to be in love with you the more I am.”

“We fought it for so many years it is difficult to let go,” I said, feeling my heart jolt at her words but struggling not to show it yet. “If you don’t want this physical relationship with me, Scully, just let me know. As long as I have you in my life I’ll be happy; just don’t leave me out in the cold completely.”

She leaned back and I loosened my arms so we could look at each other. “After the way I jumped you tonight, do you really think I don’t want you in bed?” she said, gazing up at me with one arched auburn brow raised and a smile twitching at the corners of her full red mouth. “You really don’t think my stumble in the kitchen was an accident, do you?”

I couldn’t help grinning down at her. “You’re not that good of an actress,” I agreed. “But I’ll take you any way I can get you, bad acting and all.”

She moved her hands from my back around to my chest, sliding them up to wrap around my neck. “How about no acting at all?” she said, looking at me openly and showing what she felt for me on her face. I felt a tremor shudder through me at that look. “Stay the night, Mulder, I want to wake with you in my bed tomorrow morning.”

My heart leapt. Instead of answering I moved my hands up to her head, leaned down and kissed her, finding her meeting me halfway and kissing me back just as enthusiastically. I all but lost myself in it, my world spiraling down to the feel of the willing woman in my arms, her full soft length pressed deliciously against me, her tongue and lips meeting mine with equal fervor. Despite just having finished a short time ago I was already hard again and more than ready for her.

We sank to the floor, pushing and yanking at each other’s clothes. I was too impatient to make it to the bed and clearly she felt the same way; we barely got my jeans down to my ankles and her robe untied and pushed aside—thankfully she hadn’t put panties on I discovered—before I rolled on top of her right there on the floor, between the cedar chest at the foot of her bed and the dresser. Neither of us had to guide me in; my cock found her damp opening and I slid into her as if we’d been doing this for years, not our bare third—no, fourth—time. “Oh, Jesus,” I groaned, kissing and licking at her bowed neck as I held still and enjoyed the sensation of being inside her, soft and wet and hot and tight. “I can’t get enough of you, Scully.”

“Same here, Mulder,” she breathed, her head thrown back, arms around my shoulders holding me down on her as I began to move. Her legs were wrapped around my hips and while the floor was hard on my knees, I was glad it was bare wood so we at least wouldn’t get carpet burns. “God, how I need you!”

“Are you OK?” I managed to say, hoping I wasn’t slamming her painfully into the hard floor.

“Fine, Jesus, fine and I mean that,” she gasped back at me, moving her hands down to grab my hips and pull them against her. “Don’t you dare stop!”

I concentrated on driving into her, letting her soft body cushion me as I moved my arms under her shoulders to help hold her in place; I knew if she slid on the floor it would probably be uncomfortable. And God help me, I could not stop even long enough to make it to the bed.

Her strong, slender body moved beneath me, meeting my thrusts as her legs tightened each time, driving me deeper into her. I was trying to pace myself, last a little longer than I had last time, but it was almost overwhelming to want to let go and pound into her mindlessly. Knowing that I was about to lose control and she didn’t seem that close yet I lifted myself on my arms, placing my hands above her shoulders so she wouldn’t slide then reached down with one hand to find her clit but she brushed my hand aside. “I’ll do that,” she half-gasped, gazing up at me as she moved one hand between her legs. I bowed my back even more so she could reach herself and even without looking it ratcheted up my arousal to feel her hand there; I knew if I looked I was a goner. “You worry about your part.”

God, was that my partner! Bossy even now, I thought lovingly. I choked back a laugh and said, “Yes, ma’am,” and kept right on pumping strongly into her. “This—good?”

“Incredible,” she breathed, gazing up at me with lips parted and cheeks flushed. Her thick red hair was spread around her head on the golden oak floor; I never saw it mussed except when we were making love and that was how I liked it best.

“You are—so beautiful, so—incredible,” I managed to tell her, wanting desperately for her to know how I saw her.

“Oh, Mulder, I’m almost th--,” she gasped out, bucking her hips up against mine out of rhythm, helplessly I knew. She was staring up at me wild-eyed, rosebud mouth open, panting. “Don’t—don’t stop—I’m—oh, God!”

Her inner muscles contracted around me like a warm, wet fist once—twice—three times before relaxing as she let out a long, low wordless moan, her eyes falling shut. I had slowed to experience her orgasm but now I let myself go, lowering my body onto hers as both of her arms went around my shoulders again and she softened beneath me, her muscles no longer tense and straining though she still thrust back against me. She was a quiet lover, my Scully, but so responsive and passionate that I couldn’t have asked for more. 

My elbows were painful on the floor but I barely noticed as I held her flushed face between my hands and kissed her long and hard as I pounded into her as wild and fast as I wanted. For the first time I let out everything I thought and felt for her. When I dazedly realized that I was peaking I dragged my mouth away from hers and arched back, grinding against her as I lost control, hearing myself cry out her name.

We panted against each other for a time, me keeping myself up off her chest enough that she could breathe while wanting to just melt into her. Finally I managed to lift myself up on my arms above her supine body and smiled down at her. “Think we can make it to the bed now?”

“Doesn’t matter to me where we are,” she said, reaching up to pull me back down on top of her. “As long as I’m with you, Mulder, I’m happy,” she whispered against my lips before claiming them with her own.

She was right. I kissed her back with everything I had, sinking my hands into the thick hair that I’d wanted to touch freely for so long, letting go of the remaining worries and concerns; it was far past time I admitted to myself that I was happy too. We had to let go of all the crap, bullshit, and misunderstandings we’d sheltered for so long and begin our lives anew with each other—right here, right now.

finis


End file.
